


Date #10

by Effloresense



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Accidental Fem!Dom, Adorkable, Awkwardness, Begging, Cooking, Cunnilingus, Everything Going Wrong, F/M, First Time, Loss of Virginity, Missionary Position, Oral Sex, Sexy Times, Sweetness, Unable to get off at first, blowjob, excessive blushing, protected intercourse, well at first
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-20
Updated: 2017-04-12
Packaged: 2018-10-08 13:35:31
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10387806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Effloresense/pseuds/Effloresense
Summary: Yoosung had the first 10 dates all planned out. They've been busy with school but talking all the time, and have made as much time as they could. But this is the magical 10th date. After a couple months of dating and school being not as stressful for the moment, Yoosung is going to woo her with cooking for the first time.Dates don't always go as smooth as planned though. But really, it's the awkward muddling through that makes everything sweet and human, isn't it?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [PatchworkFelicity](https://archiveofourown.org/users/PatchworkFelicity/gifts).



The metallic sound of my knocking echoes in the concrete hallway. Yoosung and I have been dating for a couple of months now, but mostly they’re study dates or movies and some cheap hole in the wall for dinner. A couple sessions of heavy petting in my apartment, but more often lately, he’s been running away just when things were getting good. This is actually the first time I’m going to his apartment, and the very first time he’s cooking for me, even though we’re often at least having meals together over the phone at least once a day. 

Nothing. I check my phone again. Apartment 753. I have the right place. Unless he mistyped something? I raise my hand to knock again, but when I expect to connect with door, I connect with flesh. Twice. My boyfriend opens the door saying, “I’m sorry, you must not have heard me say I’d be… OW.” Eep! His forehead! Before I knock him a third time, my hands fly to hide my rapidly reddening face.

“I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to hit you, Yoosung!” I peek again, and he’s chuckling while rubbing his head with his free hand, the other draped up the door as he leaned against it. He’s wearing a dress shirt and tie, tailored slacks that might be the ones he wore to the party, and his hair about the most tamed I think I have ever seen it. I feel woefully underdressed in my cute sweater and skirt. 

“Your knuckles are sharp.”

My blush deepens. “I’m sorry!!!” 

“Y-you said that,” he stutters. For some reason, he’s blushing too. His hands drop though, one wrapped behind his back and the other extended toward me. “W-would you like to come in though?” All I can do is take his offered hand; it’s chillier than normal. He must be nervous too. 

Past the threshold, I lean in for a kiss hello. Unfortunately he thought the same thing, and our timing was off, because somehow I manage to dig his glasses into his face when my nose hits the wrong place. At this point all I can do is laugh. Same for him it seems as we rub our mutually pained faces. “I’m soooo sorry!” I choke through the laughter. I sure hope the rest of the night isn’t like this. 

“I think that one was my fault,” he ruefully grins. 

Quickly I slip off my shoes and he guides me into the apartment. It’s remarkably clean. Hell, I think it’s cleaner than my place. I’m going to have to fix that. Nice laminate floor, the main room is compact, but efficiently designed. Instead of a dining table, looks like he has a breakfast bar at the kitchen. 

That’s when it hits me. “Cheese?” The scent of cheese wafts from the kitchen and fills the space. 

His smile broadens. “You said you liked American food. So the menu tonight is steak with mushrooms and a red wine reduction, cheesy potatoes, and a salad.” He’s led me to the breakfast bar and helps me up into the seat. 

My eyes widen. “Steak? Wine? How did you… I would have been fine with omurice.” He has a student budget, how could he spend so much? Is he going to be eating cup noodles for the next month? I couldn’t even remotely be okay with that. 

His hands wave in front of him as he takes in my look. “Hey! No worries!” his face falls. “I have ways to treat my girlfriend extra special well. The details are secret!”

I reluctantly agree to his explanation; I can’t help it, he is so eager and he put so much thought into this. I’ll leave him alone on that with a little bit of teasing. “You didn’t pimp yourself out for it, did you Yoosung?” 

His violet eyes widen and he resembles a puppy that has been caught doing something they shouldn’t have. Disturbing and awkward silence blankets the room. It was intended to be a joke, but it looks like I had hit a little too close to the mark. “Y-Yoosung… you didn’t…”

“NO! No, you have the wrong idea. But… I did take on an odd job. Nothing to worry about. Please believe me!” I breathe a sigh of relief while he panics. Even his panicking I find adorable. 

“It’s oKAY, Yoosung,” I giggle. “I believe you. I’m curious, but if it makes you feel better to keep that to yourself I won’t pry anymore.” I shrug and smile, and his face lights up like I had given him some special rare LOLOL item. 

He settles into a bit of a starry-eyed goofy lovestruck look that makes me shift in my seat for how intensely he’s looking at me. I’m not sure how long that goes for, but he starts with, “Your smile…” when the smell of the steaks go distinctly carbon sharp and I have to interrupt him.

“Yoosung! The steaks!” He shakes himself out of it with a yelp to see that there’s a small bit of smoke coming from the pan. He pulls it off with a small cuss under his breath, and takes the tongs to pull them out. 

They are in fact a bit more charred than I typically would go for. “I should have paid more attention,” he muttered forlornly. 

Helping best I can, I toss to him, “Blackened is a cooking style, isn’t it?”

“Maybe? I don’t think it works that way with steaks though,” he shrugs towards me and tilts his head as though to examine the meat from another angle while lifting them with his tongs. “Maybe ketchup will be better for this? I, um, don’t think the red wine will, ah, help.” 

“Then I guess we’ll just have to drink the wine instead.” I smile. “It’s okay. I’m sure it’ll still be fine.” 

He grumbles, “Seven is not going to let me live this down.”

I arch my eyebrow. “Seven?” is all I ask.

“Aaaaah — you didn’t hear that.” 

While he’s to the side of the kitchen range, I reach across the counter to gently grab his tie and guide him toward me. He drops the tongs onto the plate with a clatter, but neither of us care when I press my lips against his to get a taste. His lips are always so soft, and I can tell he’d had a touch of the wine to get a taste, probably before I got here. I had intended to give him a break from the embarrassment with the slow kiss I led him in.

Intended.

What I got is me readjusting my stance to be a little more comfortable and knocking the open bottle of red wine right onto his dress shirt. It seemed wholly unfair as I let go and we move apart in slow motion. He rights the bottle quick as he can; most of it still seems to be in there. Damage done though, there is a distinctly darker spot on his blue shirt where it soaked up the wine and I find myself praying that it didn’t get his pants too. 

“I’ll take care of cleanup. You should get changed and that shirt in the wash asap so it doesn’t stain,” I slide out of my chair and scurry around the counter where he stands not exactly dripping, but certainly trying to not get the wine on anything else. He just nodded and sort of walked awkwardly with his legs spread making sure the fabric didn’t touch anymore of the other fabric. 

I hear a dresser drawer open and close and the soft close of a door. Wait, dresser? Out here? I whip my head to look and see there’s a bookshelf cutting off part of the room and a dresser with a TV on top just to the side of what seems to be an alcove. Oh. I guess his bed is behind the bookcase. I didn’t catch at first that this actually is a studio apartment, thinking there was only a main room and the bedroom was off elsewhere. 

Absentmindedly, I start cleaning up the wine with a rag that I found, hoping it’s a reasonable enough choice. Doesn’t look like there’s any actually on the cabinets, amazingly. But I find I can’t keep my mind off the fact that there’s a bed. Right there. 

And if we’re watching movies or something there’s mostly just one place to go.

I glance back and then hyper focus on cleaning the wine up. Can’t let it stain. Nope. No staining. 

I didn’t think about the fact that he would be coming back with the way I bent over to clean.

“_______, did you find the cleaning sup….”

I leave the rag on the floor to bolt upright, smoothing my skirt down my backside. My heart stops. When I spin around, to see the deep vermillion of his face, his mouth hidden behind his hand, I feel my own face heat up. I KNEW I should have worn tights. I didn’t even need blush the rate this night is going. “Ididn’tseeanythingIswear.”

“Onlypeoplewhosawsomethingsaythat,” I blurt right back and slap my own hands over my mouth.

The two of us dorks. Standing there. Embarrassed and awkward. So of course I start to giggle. We are in the midst of a legitimate sitcom level mess of a date so far and I am trying to hold them back. Yoosung’s eyes start to crinkle though, and his shoulders are shaking, and I think he’s trying to not laugh too.

I can only laugh harder. 

His eyes shut and he bends in on himself a little and now I can hear myself which mean he can and all I can do is try to not laugh so hard I cry. He straightens up again and pulls me into his arms. We just embrace and laugh until we can get ourselves under control again. The cotton of his t-shirt is super soft against my cheek. His chest is solid and I love the sound of him breathless. I burrow in just a little more to feel that much closer to his racing heart.

Glancing up, I find his lips taking mine in. This kiss is almost like we had never stopped before the wine spilled, but we get to be closer. He’s so warm and I love the support of his arm in the small of my back lifting me just slightly up into him, his other hand tangled lightly in my hair. Whereas before I was in control of the kiss, however, he is very clearly taking the lead this time. I shiver at the feeling of his tongue slowly exploring me and the more I yield, the closer he pulls me. 

His heartbeat spikes when the feel of his kiss pulls a squeaky sigh from me. Reluctantly he pulls away. Kiss bruised and unfocused gaze, I feel a part of me tighten at the sight of him looking so delicious. Even the slight haze of his damaged left eye looks almost rugged on him.

“H-hungry?” His voice is lower than I’ve heard before, throaty and rougher and it takes a moment for me to realize what he asked.

“Um?” Damn, I squeaked again. 

“D-do you want dinner? The gratin at least should be good.”

I refocus. “Oh. Yeah.” I shake myself clear a bit and we pull apart a bit. “Yeah, we could do that.” 

“Could you grab the salad out of the fridge?” I can’t turn away, but I do dumbly nod. He turns to the task of setting up the food and that snaps me out enough to turn to my own task. I hear his shaky slow breath behind me and try to ignore the fluttering that sound bounces through me. 

There isn’t much in there, so it’s easy to figure out what I’m intended to get. I grab the dressing too. 

He’s already pulled the gratin out and examining the steaks again, cuts away some of the worst burned parts. We quietly get to plating everything; he sits to the left of me on the other stool next to mine at the breakfast bar and holds up a glass of the wine.

I mirror him.

“To date #10,” he smiles. I smile back and clink my glass to his. 

“To date #10,” I echo.

He might have drank his glass a little faster than I expected, but it was rather tasty.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which things heat up

Yoosung tosses the towel he dried his hands off with. A stack of dishes glistens with the last bit of moisture as I carefully place the last dish in the rack.

“You really didn’t have to help me, I could have taken care of all this after you left.” A sort of self-deprecating smile tilts his lips.

So typical of him. Yoosung does have a tendency to take on too much by himself, and I want him to understand that he can rely on me. He’s sacrificed so much already, I really don’t want him exhausting himself taking care of me too. “But you cooked such a fabulous dinner! I had to do something, or I would have felt bad.”

He shakes his head. “Now I KNOW you’re buttering me up. I can’t believe I did that to the steaks.”

“But how else would I know what leather tasted like?” I tease; I can’t help it, I have to get him out this loop. 

His eyes widen like I said something strange. “W-Well, if you insist that it was fine, okay,” he laughs nervously and it seems like he can’t even look me in the face now. “I’ll make sure next time I do better though.”

I hook a belt loop with my finger and pull him closer to me so I can look up at him and smile fully. “I look forward to it then.” My heart is racing so much, but I had to get his attention somehow. He had looked like he was retreating and I wanted to bring him back to the here and now.

Fingers soft as butterfly wings cradle my cheek as he searches for something. I don’t know how it was that he went from pulling away to this intense look, but I like it. Kisses like whispers pass between our lips and I find that I want to pull so much closer to him. Before I can deepen the kiss though, his voice deepens to ask, “So what would you like to do with the rest of the evening? We have options…” he trails off. 

I want to spend the rest of the evening making out with him. But I’m also nervous. I try to lean up to kiss him again, but he backs away a little smile on his face. The mixed signals make me even more confused as to what to do, so I mentally stumble for a second. “Um… we… uh… How about… Maybe… You could introduce me to LOLOL?”

A shadow crosses his face as though that was not what he was expecting, but I’m a little at a loss for what I should have said when he backed away. Shifting into a bit of embarrassment, he admits, “I… uh… would rather not with LOLOL. I don’t want you to see me that way, and I certainly don’t want to share you with the guild tonight.”

My lips screw to the side as I try to think of something else. He glances towards the TV and the clear bedroom section of his studio, and I know I both light up and fidget a bit as my weight shifts barely side to side. 

“I have a couple consoles though. We could pile pillows for a backrest and maybe play something there?” It feels a little like his flimsy excuse that I hope I’m not imagining is clear as a fresh washed window. 

“Sure!” I answer, without much more thought. At least it gets us somewhere comfortable even if he’s not being suggestive with the bed. 

He places his hand in the small of my back to lead me there. I grab his hand though and bounce my way to the bed, jumping up kneeling on the bed as I beam up at him. He looks a little like his heart might stop. It takes him a moment before he visibly breathes again. “Is everything alright, Yoosung?”

“Y-Yeah. Why don’t you set up the pillows, I’ll get the console set up,” he rushes out and turns around to pull out one of the consoles and start fumbling the connections. 

One by one, I stack the pillows against the wall. A chirping sound comes out of the television and I make way for him as he unwinds two controllers for us and he climbs his way on the bed too, certainly more gingerly than I did. I hope I didn’t make it less stable or something. His legs spread, and he pats the space between them indicating I should sit. 

I lean over first to kiss his nose. Then I turn and settle down between his legs, wriggling back until I’m right up against him. He groans. I wriggle a few more times for good measure; he wraps his arms around me and presses his lips to the juncture of my neck and shoulder, teeth grazing in the sort of warning bite a kitten with too many pets will give a person. I can only laugh.

Yoosung pushes my hair aside more completely to settle his chin right on my shoulder. He turns slightly and sniffs. “You smell extra good tonight,” he murmurs. 

“N-New perfume.”

“Mmmm.”

I’m not sure what it is about this, but I’m feeling extra alive. On edge. Every point of contact between myself and Yoosung has little fireworks exploding. I’m certain he feels my heart racing, but he keeps very still with me. I’m not that fragile, but he treats me so carefully sometimes. His breath is unnaturally even.

His chin feels pointy.

A controller slips into my hand and Yoosung slips his hands under my arms holding his own controller. I hold it close to me. “Have you played this game before?”

I shake my head no.

“Ok, here are the controls, this does…” He proceeds to show me what each of the buttons does. He’s very thorough, but with how close he is and the way he’s keeping his voice low I find myself controlling my breath as well. I have to work hard to pay attention. “Okay, do you want drive or throw? Driving is harder, but it’s not difficult to pick up.”

“One or the other?”

“Yeah, this is a game where we play in tandem together to try to win a race.” His breath makes all the little hairs in its path tickle and I squirm again. His arm tightens.

“Um, I… I can give… I mean… I can drive. If you want me to.” I can’t help it, I blush. I’m not sure why, but I do.

We choose our characters, he sets it to the easiest level, and we find ourselves at the starting line. We start and I crash. I crash a lot. Literally by the time I make my first time around the game ends because the other “players” have made it around three times and we are in last place. 

But he’s quiet in his encouragement. I think the way I lean into the turns also makes him laugh. His laugh makes me feel like I have bubbles inside my heart. Victory is when by the time we finish the last circuit, I am in second to last place on that run. I might have actually jumped to see that I was not last, no one could confirm that though.

He pauses things and places his controller down. I tilt my head and ask,“Yoosung, don’t you want to show me what it’s supposed to look like when you drive?”

“Mmmm, in a bit. I haven’t really been gaming much because my eyes get strained so easily these days. I need to use that for school work. “ His head buries in my neck again, his glasses digging just slightly into the curve of my chin. 

I can’t help the whine of concern that eeks its way out of my throat. “Yoosung, you should have told me, we could have done something else. Does your head hurt?” I twist against him and straddle to bring his legs closer together so I can kneel on either side. His soft fluffy hair pours through my fingertips as I pet him directly. Worry must be creasing my face because he frowns more when I’m looking at him.

“It’s fine. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to worry you. We can pick up where we left off if it makes you feel better…”

If I’m not careful, I’ll give myself whiplash for how vehemently I deny his suggestion. I don’t even brush my hair out of my face when I pull my fingertips to his temples to stroke them softly, hoping I bring some sort of relief to him. 

His breath sounds ragged and I’m worried that he’s in more pain. I brush his hair and face back. Adams apple bobbing with a swallow, it’s then that I notice there is more to him between my legs than I had been paying attention to. Luscious lips are parted with his breathing and look so plush. I can’t help it. Leaning down, my lips graze against his and his hands find my backside to pull me closer. 

That hitch in my breath, I think it caused him to twitch underneath me. He leans in closer and deepens the kiss. It’s like his tongue is exploring spaces in me I didn’t even know existed and that electric feeling is back. Kisses so intertwined, our heartbeats are merging at a dizzying pace. When my hips roll in reaction, a soft “ha” expels past his lips and he draws me back in. 

He’s far more in control now he leads the kiss in ways that I find it hard to stay still atop him. I follow and squirm and the more that I squirm the more commanding his kiss is. Hands seem to multiply. They have to as I can’t keep track of where he’s touching anymore. Both of them slip under my sweater and sweep in a steady rhythm across me, one sliding it’s way to the swell of my breast. 

We are not strangers to this kind of making out. But there’s something about tonight that feels different. An urgency. A firmness. A direction that seems inevitable. He shudders at the caress of my breast and hums at the way I lean into his touch. I have no idea how long this goes on, this ebb and flow of touches and movement, but I notice that the light in this space is dimmer. He twists in our dance and next I know, he has me laying down with his beautiful self hovering over me.

“__________,” Rough and piercing, the way he says my name makes me clench all over. In a good way. Oh god, definitely in a good way.

“Yoosung,” I breathlessly whisper. His eyes roll back for just a moment.

“The way you say my name… Do you even know what you do to me?” His hand wanders to the crease at my hip, perilously close to where I want him to touch me. 

“I have to imagine it’s something like what you do to me.”

Hesitation pauses everything on his scarlet face. I can tell he’s alight with desire. He’s not running away. Why is he waiting thought? Just touch me already!

“I love you.” My heart jumps at his declaration. He’s said it countless times before, but tonight it’s a benediction, a promise. The way it echoes in the chambers of my heart it reverberates through many lives. 

There are those moments where you reach a still point. Where there is nothing outside of these three and half walls bathed in the dimmed brilliant lights from the television. His eyes are looking for something, maybe it’s courage.

“W-Would…” he’s holding his voice back, but there’s a deepness I’ve rarely heard before tonight. “Would you… Let me make love to you…. Tonight that is? Now?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comments before! They were the encouragement that I need so that this didn't take another 4 months for me to write a chapter. I hope you enjoyed!


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which conclusions happen as are expected.

The last thing I wanted to do was freeze. I feel like I’ve been waiting forever to move forward. Maybe it’s just the hormones of our age, but I half wondered if he was going to wait until marriage. Still, it would be dishonest to not admit that the thought scared me just a little. Everything I had heard was that it would hurt, but I love him so much. I thought it was only a moment that my brain short circuited and I couldn’t react.

“You know? Nevermind. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to push you. I-I’ll let you dictate when…”

He didn’t get to finish whatever he was saying. I silenced him with the most forward kiss I think I’ve ever given him. My hips lifted to meet his and he yielded when I pulled him closer from his retreat.

It didn’t take him long for Yoosung.exe to reboot. Once he processed that I was on board, the pressure from his body and his lips resumed and I could feel exactly how turned on he was. More than usual, in his haste, he was all limbs and elbows feeling at turns both delicious and awkward. 

The first time it was clear something didn’t go right, his eyes go wide. I laugh. He relaxes. “You can slow down, Yoosung, we’ll get there. I want to get there too.”

“Mmmm,” he growls and rolls into my hips, “Want now.” I can’t help but gasp. This is a more visceral Yoosung than I am used to seeing. He may not know exactly where to put his hands at every moment, but I can’t seem to care as every little sound he makes turns me on more and I want.

I mean, it’s not like my hands are fumble free when I start messing with his pants to release him. His hands scratch at my back trying to undo my bra while I find that the button just does not want to slip through the hole. We look at each other struggling and I start laughing. “Let me help you with that.” I slip my sweater over my head and flip the front closure on my bra so it pops open like a jewelry box.

He may have felt me up before, but I think this is the first time Yoosung’s getting a reasonable enough look and I giggle at his pause. My hands find the edge of his shirt and lift up. His arms float with the movement, but he never takes his eyes off me. Moments where fabric were the only thing that blocked his view changed nothing of his expression of pure amazement. I palm him and that wakes him up to wipe the corner of his mouth as he moans. 

Lightly I tease with my fingertip. He manages to pull it together just enough to eke out a “Was that a yes then?” If voices could be wrecked, that would be my sweetie. 

“Yes. I love you. I…. I want to be one with you,” I rush. That was harder to say than I expected, but I don’t think he would have done anything more if I didn’t definitively confirm it. It’s kind of nice, actually. 

The confirmation changes something. Slows him down. Like knowing that it’s going to happen has instilled some level of confidence in him as he dives in to kiss all around my breasts. He tests and he teases and he sees what best reactions he can get from me just playing there informed by previous evenings. I’m so glad I wore matching underwear tonight, even though I had no idea what he had planned as he slides my skirt down until underwear is all that’s left and I aim to hide my upper self. 

Yoosung’s gaze is lower anyway. His nose drags across my panties and the gasp he pulls from me when he hits that spot… his face just lights up. He has found the answer to his problem set and he is closing in on finishing his homework. A brief kiss, and he tugs my underwear off, leaving me uncertain where to cover. 

He moves so fast to get his open pants and underwear off. But I don’t even get a chance to get a good look at him. 

Looking me right in the eye, he has this delighted smile hovering below me. Lips so soft kiss to make me gasp and clench the bedsheets. My god, I am made of ten thousand stars blazing. I don’t even know what’s happening to me, but the care with which he usually kisses me feels even more there. And the way his moan buzzes, my world narrows. I have absolutely no idea how long we’re like this. My head is spinning from the pleasure. At some point, he even slides a finger inside me. Combined with his kisses and a suddenly a second finger and a curl, I am shaking.

I am shaking and trying to not be too loud for his neighbors and I am wetter than I have ever been. 

Gathering myself together, I catch him wiping his face and savoring his hand clean. He’s kneeling up and I see his cock for the first time, erect and red and about the oddest shape I could imagine. Even when I’ve touched him, I never could imagine the exact dimensions before. I don’t even know what to compare it to, the words have all but fled my brain.

He finishes and catches me ogling him. Red doesn’t even begin to describe his face realizing what he had been doing. I don’t know how he does it, but he uses his shoulder to block my view of his face when he leans over to grab a foil packet from his nightstand. I wonder how long he’s had those.

Rolling over me, he settles on the other side, hardness resting against my thigh. Gingerly, he kisses me and I melt all over again. He smells just a little muskier than he did before, and I blush to realize why when he pulls back. It takes a little bit of concentration on his part to put on the condom correctly, flipping it back and forth until he realizes which way it’s supposed to roll. But the smile he has for me shines. And ready, his fingers tease my entrance, and his strong arms roll me on top of him. 

I’m sure I look as quizzical as I feel because he blushes and stammers, “I-i-it might hurt less if you… I mean you can… if you’re on top.” On… top? “So you can, you know, control… entry…”

“But how…?” I look down, and honestly while I have an idea in theory how this might work, I’m terrified of hurting him. What if I break him? He looks a little panicked at my freezing, so he holds me closer.

Whispers tickle the wisps of hair near my ear, “You don’t have to, I just want you to feel safe.”

“Of course I’m safe, I’m with you, Yoosung.” His chest trembles under my fingertips and his breath intakes sharply. 

One more heartbeat and the next thing I know I can see the ceiling behind his head. “I’ll take care of you then, honey,” he rumbles. I didn’t even know he could sound like that. He leans back again to eye the lining of himself up with my opening. So gentle is his touch as he strokes my entrance again and I start to relax. He’ll take care of me. The slight bit of pressure feeling him right there makes me yearn, but I’m afraid to move quite yet. 

Pressure grows. Eyes roll back and he desperately tries to refocus on me. And then there’s a point when it stings. A whimper claws it’s way out the back of my throat and he pauses. “Are you ok? Breathe.”

Oh. Right. Breathing. “Y-yeah, I’m okay. It just… stings a little.”

“Do you want me to pull out? We can try another time?” Haste paints his face with worry.

“N-No. I’ll be okay in a second, I think.”

Arching his way down, he brings his lips to mine and kisses me gently. It’s enough of a distraction, at some point he slides the rest of the way in and the sting settles into a dull ache. My arms wrap around his torso and my nails dig in just slightly; it pulls him just a little closer and I feel him swell with his gasp. That movement didn’t hurt so much though, so I catch his eye and nod shyly. 

His movements start small, arcing wider with each stroke. His movements are smooth, but there must be some level of friction; I can feel every bit of him and I just feel hotter and hotter. Lips kiss at every inch of flesh they can reach. I marvel in the way that his muscles plump and lengthen under my fingertips as I skirt from his shoulders to his thighs and every glorious spot in-between.

Sometimes when he speeds up I feel the edges of my vision fade out. And then I look up at him. A sweat bead trails its way from his hairline down the edge of his face. The wisps cling to his skin. I shift so I can lick it away from dripping on me. 

I never knew salty could taste so amazing. “Haaaaaaa….. Oh god….” He moans and shudders when I do that and it makes me clench. He couldn’t close his mouth if he wanted with the way he tosses his head back and it makes him reach deeper within me. They say that scent is little bits of objects breaking off and entering you to become a part of you. All I can smell is Yoosung’s inherent self. He’s in my lungs, in my veins. 

The dull ache seems to have faded to something more. Something pulling me more forward. It still aches, but with want not pain. Does this ever have to end? Please let this never end. I’m not even sure what I’m saying anymore if anything. What are words?

I look him in the eyes and my heart clenches to see one so cloudy, striving to connect with me still. His soul is laid bare before me filled with love and desire and I do my best to reciprocate. Pleasure and the pain of the knowledge of his sacrifice for his friends, for me, I want to give him everything. 

Everything is for him. 

He fills my vision for as long as I can look at him before I start shaking, and that feeling I had before overtakes me. I’m vibrate with not being able to tell where I end and he begins and I don’t know if there’s a god, but if there is one god resides right there in the white out of sight.

I don’t have an ounce of strength in me anymore. Pudding has more cohesion than I feel right now able to melt into the bed. He’s still for a moment looking at me with… eyes shine and he’s panting and I think this is what wonder looks like. 

After a few moments, he starts to move again. Sensitive. So sensitive. Where it felt good before, it’s such a shockingly overwhelmingly intense feeling, I cry out and he stops again. “I… I can’t…” is all I can gasp out to him. A complicated shadow brushes past his face, and he pulls out to lay beside me and gather me in his arms.

Where I feel as liquid and boneless as a cat in its owner’s arms in the sun, Yoosung is whipcord taut. His breath is uneven and shuddering through the intake and exhalation. It couldn’t have been more than a minute of that, but I can tell he is still rigid enough that his heartbeat throbs against my thigh. 

“Yoosung, are you okay?”

“Mmm, I will be.”

“What’s wrong?” Alarm races through me for how halting his tone is. 

“N-Nothing. I… It’s nothing.” Why is he brushing aside whatever is bugging him? “You… did.. Did it feel good?”

“I feel better than any back rub or bathtub soak. I’m so relaxed I might not have any bones…. Yoosung, why aren’t you relaxed too?”

His face is scarlet at my question. “I-I… It’s… I’m okay. You don’t have to worry,” he squeaks. This alarms me more than how stiff he still is. Stiff. 

I vaguely remember my friends talking in whispered tones and how he doesn’t always feel like this and have to ask him. “Yoosung, did, did you feel good too?”

“Yes!” he rushes. “That was amazing! I… I just… It’s okay. I like holding you.”

Tears gather in my eyes. He’s being so evasive and I’m worried with how not happy he *feels*. I would have thought the same elation I had would have been evident from him. That he would have been singing heavenly choirs from the ceiling or something. 

I twist against him and in accidentally brushing against his still hard self. His eyes flutter closed and he pants in something that looks both pleasurable and painful. Too late, he catches himself and tries to tamp it down, but his body has already betrayed how lost in lust he still wants to be. Desperation colors his every light vocalization, every undulation. 

Realization smacks me upside the head. Wherever it was I went, he did not follow. Guilt crashes down on me as I move with the understanding of what happened. He cannot stop himself from grinding against the bits of me that contact him. If his cock could have grabbed me and begged me for more, it would have. Tears collect at the edges of his eyes with the torment beside me.

“Are you sure you’re okay, Yoosung?”

“Yes… just… I… please…. I couldn’t… You felt amazing, but I… I was so nervous. I wanted to make it good for you. And then you were too… I just want…. But I can…”

My poor boo. I was so wrapped up in my own peak that I missed that he hadn’t… Feather light I trail my fingers against the rolling flesh below his cock and the whine this rips from his throat… I’m not sure I’ve ever heard anything so tasty.

I try it again. He writhes. “Please!” His plaintive cry reaches in to my heart and seizes it. “God…. Please… Anything…”

Where before he had wanted me to take the initiative and I balked, now he’s begging. The unfettered reactions to every twitch I give against his skin fills me with a feeling of power I have never experienced before. I roll the condom off him, and his teeth catch his bottom lip. He can’t even keep his eyes open anymore. He grinds against the open air I think expecting some part of me and the distress that emanates from his voice is so plain, I want to do anything to help him. 

My fingers trail up against his naked cock and he whines again with the surge against me wanting so much more. Wrapping my fingers gently around him, I lean over and kiss the side of his rigidness. The sound is so delicious I kiss it again in a slightly different spot, my hand sliding against the amazingly movable skin over his steel core. His nails claw so tightly into the bedsheets I wonder if he might tear a hole in them. 

“Tongue…” is all he can get out. So I flick my tongue against him there, wet and rough. A hint of the way latex smells merges with the Yoosung flavor. His reaction is immediate, arching against the softness below us. He moves so much that it’s hard for me to keep up with him, so when he falls out of my touch and he looks so pained at me for being even apart a second I make sure to take him back in hand. I kiss a few more times, drag my tongue along his length. His tip feels even more salty than his skin did before. His scent is so much stronger here, I just want to roll around in it. I want him to fully mark me as his. 

Eventually, I wrap my lips around his tip. Drag them along his length, once, twice, on the third one he wordlessly cries out and his pulsing is so intense, a salty bitter taste fills my mouth. I’m so surprised I pull back and he just pulses and pulses. A white fluid shoots up to his cheek, along the dip in his pecs, against his stomach. Tears of relief flood down his temples into his sweaty hair. 

He shakes so much in the aftershocks, I gather him best as I can in my arms without getting myself any more dirty until he can ride it out. Cradled into my bosom, as he comes down he nuzzles into me, gentle kisses around my nipple.

I may not have known what I was doing, and I may not be sure about the taste of what just happened, but the bliss is so palpable from him it was worth whatever uncertainty I had. In fact, I know for certain, I was the directly cause of that rapture. Whatever I felt before, it’s on par with what I witness in my beloved for sure. 

I pet his sweaty hair. His pulse still rampages at the points that make it apparent. He clings to me as much as he can without getting any of the mess on me. Eventually, he manages to rasp, “My god… that was… I couldn’t even imagine… That is nothing like alone……..” If I had any doubt before, I’m soaring with the knowledge that he felt as good as I had. In fact, the high is just as good.

“I’m glad I redeemed myself.”

“Wuh— What?” He looks up at me hazy and confused.

“Since you couldn’t before… I’m glad I…” He shuts me up before I can say anything more with a passionate kiss. 

Hands cradle my face “Don’t… You were perfect. I just wanted so bad to make it perfect for you. You did everything… You are so beautiful. And I’m the luckiest man in the world. My god…” He drops back boneless against me.

My heart is full of him. 

We lay there for a bit, cooling, pulses returning as much to normal as they can with how very very naked we are. Lethargy and stickiness keep us together until he pries his sleepy self from me. “I need to shower… You can join if you want… But please stay tonight. I don’t know if I can let you go tonight.”

“I probably should, you look like you’re going to fall over.”

Giddiness lightens his laugh, “I might.”

“Well I can’t let that happen, now can I?” I beam at him. Exhaustion weighs his limbs down but he manages to pull himself together enough to get to the edge of the bed. He lurches towards the tv and turns it off, leaving just the kitchen light drifting in. A hand reaches out towards me and I only know this from the shadows. I grasp it without hesitation though and he pulls me toward him. 

I could drown in the kiss he gives me, his hand softer against my cheek than I remember it ever being.

I’m also clearly as much of a mess as he is now with the way our bodies pressed together again, so I *have* to join him in the shower. 

“I love you.” It’s the only thing left I can say in a moment like this.

His breath is hot in response. “I love you too. You’re staying?” He couldn’t have kept the hope out of his voice if he had been held at knifepoint.

I hum an assent. He kisses me again, and we make our way to his tiny bathroom. It’ll be cozy but I don’t want to let him go either.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so excited to have finished this. It's a little different from other fics I've read about him, but I thought maybe his nervousness the first time would make him unable to cum at first and then it just fell into a sort of accidental edging and FemDom thing. At least as so much as she could with not knowing what to do. 
> 
> I hope people feel I did Yoosung justice. He definitely has grown on me since I was first asked to write this by Patchworkfelicity when we started talking and now I'm rather fond of him. Comment if you liked!

**Author's Note:**

> So we start with the teasing. I think this is going to be about 3 chapters, and I have it planned. Yoosung is a SHY SHY BOY though for me and I've been working on this for 4 months. When I was writing for him, the universe kept interrupting me after writing a sentence for him and then he would not talk.
> 
> Comment please if you like. I struggled enough with this that I extra need to know other people want the rest of this. Comments are life.


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